derrick duan
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Mark








2020 June, COVID restrictions are starting to lift. My mind was easily occupied by some potential social events that once again were legitimised. Small parties ensued; champagnes were drunk (thanks to Liquorland’s perpetual sale now i have an addiction), songs were sung, hugs were given. It was a good time.

June also marked the end of semester one for VCA. I managed to wrap up all the assighments in time, and now am finally left alone to focus on this pre-production.

The priority here is of course the puppet making and set building. I’m writing about them in a separate set of  journals, for convenience’s sake.

Here, hopefully I will reflect on some of the new ideas I’m trying to work into my script, many of which were born from the tangents, set off by others’ feedback on my previous version of the story. Thanks, Amy, Rob and Lucy.


The biggest change to the story, is the switch from the Neighbour to simply, the Woman. 

She is now rewritten as the Man’s partner. This way, the dynamics between the two can be much more interesting:
    1. She will have more reasons to be concerned about the Man’s wellbeings; I can spice up the dialogues and make her more persistent, undeviating and frank when she questions the Man’s actions.
    2. The Man is now less polite when he confronts her and shuts her off. He is familiar with her, and he doesn’t care too much when he speaks his mind and rejects her help.
    3. Less exposition.

Beyond this obvious change, the underlying wound of the story is now bereavement. The Man has recently lost his father, which is hinted at throughout the conversations in the first scene. 

The elevator and bathroom scenes are largely left untouched. 

There is also a constant effort to make the Man’s inner demon manifest more frequent and bold, i.e. the growing vines, and the moving concrete walls.



(0707)
My suburb has been subjected to a new round of lockdown, and my handful of plans got completely disrupted but hey, at least now I have to stay home and work on stuff.

Apart from puppet-making, I’ve been keeping up with the script edits. I’ve made a couple minor changes to the story, and cut away some dialogues.

I have also started to put together an animatic, with new storyboards and recordings from my voice actors! How exciting.

Script and storyboards at the start of June: a staggering 9-page, which is way over the page limit :(
but who cares about uni assessment?